With Malice Aforethought
by tonnie2001969
Summary: Erin Strauss thought that she hated everything about Aaron Hotchner.  But in the end, she found that she hated herself more.  Written in response to Fanfic Challenge Round 2 on Chit Chat on Author's Corner.


**Written in response to the Fanfic Challenge Round 2 on Chit Chat on Author's Corner. ****Prompts: Pairing: Aaron Hotchner and Erin Strauss….Song Title: I Hate Everything About You. **

**Please allow me to say a special thanks to writing partner and best friend ilovetvalot (Tracia)! She graciously allows me to play on her writing playground, and I am a better author because of it.**

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**With Malice Aforethought**

**Post-ep to Criminal Minds 3.02 – In Birth and Death**

One Celtic. One Hebrew.

One name hailing from the war-torn Emerald Isle, the faint whispers of pipes and pans floating in the background. The other filtering from half-way around the world, from the land where brother once fought against brother with spear and stone.

Different cultures. Different genders. Different personalities.

Different people.

Alike in name, but diabolically different in nature.

Erin Strauss. Aaron Hotchner.

Each the antithesis of the other and the bane of the other's existence.

And she was intent on removing him from her world completely.

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Ambition was an evil taskmaster. Part impetus and part tether, it provided her driving force while consecutively binding her choices. If she wanted to advance her cause, her career, then the decisions she made were not necessarily beneficial to all involved.

But as long as they were beneficial to her, she no longer cared.

Allowing Aaron Hotchner to lead the Behavioral Analysis Unit had, unfortunately, not been her choice to make. Powers that far exceeded hers issued the edict, forcing her into a stifling box, the four walls tightening ever so slightly over the past year.

The golden boy …the fair-haired child…the heir apparent. Her nemesis had many names, but none so dangerous as the one she allowed herself to whisper in the darkness.

Competition. He stood between her and her final goal.

But apparently no longer.

Now was her chance to break out of those boundaries, to create the world she preferred...the world in which she was the rising star. Contrary to Aaron Hotchner's evenly stated opinion, she was certain she possessed the skills not only to lead the Unit in times of crisis, but also to lead the entire Bureau.

For that was her ultimate ambition. And Aaron Hotchner stood directly in her path to success.

Or so she had thought.

Placing him on suspension had ignited a spark deep inside her soul that she had feared long dead. For the two weeks he had been out of her sight, she had schemed and planned, sleuthed and plotted, all with the intentions of setting into motion the wheels of justice as she wished to see them moving.

Her thoughts, clear as they were to her, bordered on Machiavellian, her willingness to twist his well-defined world in whatever manner suited her needs evident. If his unhappy homebody wife wanted to see him at the dinner table at the stroke of six each evening, all the better for her plans. If his son pined for day-to-day contact with his father, twisting that shred of guilt yielded excellent results. A smoothly spoken word here, an oh-so-casual observation there…twinges of doubts planted easily with the skill of one well accustomed to destroying lives as deemed necessary.

And all the while, she successfully tamped down any thoughts she had of her own family, of her own choices, of her own children.

She was woman. Hear her roar.

* * *

The first crack in her well-laid plans appeared well before the man had even left the building. Her casualty list exceeded her intended victim. The loss of Emily Prentiss could not be considered an accepted risk, the young woman's skills and connections far too important to lose at this juncture.

But Erin Straus soldiered on. Her job, after all, was to protect the Bureau. And as she had told the stoic Aaron Hotchner, the BAU had some very talented people among the Bureau assets. And she herself was one of them.

Or so she thought.

A flight to Milwaukee, a case rivaling the worst ever seen, the inability to stop a serial killer…all scenarios not included in her master plan. A team that seemed to operate on a surreal plane far above hers, their innate skills exceeding her ability to comprehend…not conducive to her overall goal. And the appearance of the very man she was certain she had conquered…the death knell over her proverbial career coffin.

Her authority had been usurped without a single shot fired. He had risen victorious and saved the day once again, derailing her well-defined plan of Bureau domination.

Or so she thought.

Standing outside the home of a serial killer in the very city that Jeffrey Dahmer himself had made famous, Erin Strauss stared at Aaron Hotchner. Her bullet proof vest, a necessity for sure, suddenly seemed heavier…tighter...as she said, stiffly, "None of you will ever move up the chain of command, you know that."

Her words, intended to wound, were met with a mild stare and a simple response.

"Why would I ever want to leave the BAU?" Aaron Hotchner replied.

And in those nine simple words, he proved himself to be a far greater person than she could ever become. He sought not the fame and accolades that seemed to be her end reward. He was content…self-assured of his place in his world.

Perhaps she imagined the rebuke in his tone. Perhaps what she perceived to be glimmers of condemnation in his dark eyes were merely tricks of the flickering sunlight. Perhaps she was overreacting to the stress of the situation.

Perhaps. But as she watched Aaron Hotchner turn and move steadily toward the team…his team…Erin Strauss could only give voice to one simple thought as she tugged angrily at the weighty FBI vest.

She thought she hated everything about him. But in the end, she found that she hated herself more.

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_**Author's Note**__: We're excited to announce our Round 3 of our Fanfic Challenge on Chit Chat on Author's Corner forum. The __**Dealer's Choice August Challenge**__ is a great way to stretch your writing muscles! Please see the forum for further details (you can access it on my profile page or on ilovetvalot's profile page). We'd love to have you! Sign ups extend through August 2._


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